What a difference a year makes!

HI! I know its been forever since I've blogged but I just thought I would share whats going on in our lives.

This time last year Ronn and I were feeling very blue. It was our first holiday season since Anabelle's diagnosis and I think we weren't really sure how we were feeling about everything. We were blessed by the Sparrow Clubs who gave us an amazing Christmas but unfortunately some of those toys have still gone untouched.

This year, it's still hard but I think we have come to terms (as much as possible anyway) with the path that has been set before us. It still stings a little when we walk through any department store and see all of the things Anabelle just can't play with. This would be the year of a new bike and trying to get rid of our training wheels and more Anna and Elsa stuff than we knew what to do with and it just isn't that way. However, I am feeling so grateful for another year with Anabelle. She doesn't smile as much as she used to but I know she is still in there. She still loves being snuggled and kissed. She has become so much more comfortable over the last year and sometimes enjoys just relaxing on her massage mat and watching Doc McStuffins or Mickey Mouse. I saw a quote that reminded me that Anabelle is exactly who she was meant to be; nothing more, nothing less. I know that God has her in a very special place and I am grateful that I get to see all of the lives changed simply by her presence.

Anabelle's health has been pretty good so far. She is still healthy even through the cold and flu season. She had a bad reaction to the flu shot about a month back but is doing great now. Like I said she is tolerating not always being held more and more, and that is because her Grandma Cheryl (daddy's mom) bought her a vibrating massage pad and she loves being on it (and now she has one for the car thanks to her Granny Jacq). She has no problem letting know when it has turned off (it has auto shut off). We have moved around her feeding and calorie schedule again so I am hoping to see some weight gain. She could use about 10 or 15 more pounds. She is tall though. When I have her stand up in her stander it always surprises me. She is almost 40 inches! She has long legs like her daddy's side. Her hair is growing fast! I am not sure what to do with it sometimes because it is still a little too short for braids or pony tails. She loves preschool and seeing her friends; they are all so sweet to her. She loves water physical therapy, especially now that I have been getting in with her. She is thriving and that is all that I could ask.

I titled this post with "What a difference a year makes" and that isn't because Anabelle has changed much but the world around us sure has. I see things so different now because of her. She is such a strong little girl that didn't ask for any of this. I pray that over this holiday season I find time to be quiet. Anabelle doesn't talk and I truly believe she has conversations with Jesus I don't know about because she is just a much better listener. I am trying to find motivation in that to be quiet myself. Listening to what Jesus has for me each day. I am so lucky to be her mom and as crappy as this situation has been I wouldn't trade that little girl for anything! Happy Holidays!!

Psalms 30:11-12 You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; You have loosed my sackcloth and girded me with gladness, That my soul may sing praise to You and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks to You forever.